Mama's on a Diet!

I did something kind of crazy.  Crazy because I have a million unfinished projects already but also because it leaves me feeling extremely exposed.

I went ahead and started a weight loss blog complete with measurements and all!  Ugh, it was hard to be honest and actually type it out but now it's there and hopefully those numbers will keep getting smaller and smaller.

I decided to start a separate blog because I want to keep my posts here centered more on family and life, although I'm sure the two will overlap at times.  I'm hoping that blogging about my struggles will keep me committed and motivated on my journey to find a healthier, happier me.

I hope all of you check it out and join my on my journey!

I Must Confess...

I just ate ALMOST an entire box of these:

I let Abby eat THREE at snack time.  I, trying to set a good example, ate three with her and shoveled the rest in while hiding in the kitchen.

Once I realized what I had done, I tried to make up for it by having hummus and pita for dinner with some fruit on the side.

Except that left me hungry so I grabbed more cookies.

Damn you Mother Nature for making me a woman with ZERO will power!  And damn you Entenmann's for making bite size cookies!

Focus Friday

"Whatever we focus on is bound to expand. Where we see the negative, we call forth more negative. And where we see the positive, we call forth more positive. Having loved and lost, I now love more passionately. Having won and lost, I now win more soberly. Having tasted the bitter, I now savor the sweet."

 Marianne Williamson 

The weather this week has been absolutely amazing!  I know there are a lot of you out there hoping for some snow (including Abby) but I am LOVING these mild temperatures.  I've been a bit down about my weight, it's stayed the same for the most part but that's my own fault.  I decided that this week I NEEDED start exercising.  Not an easy task with a toddler and infant so we got out walking twice this week.

First, we headed over to Jefferson Patterson Park which has a really cool Indian Village.  I love it here because I can let Abby run freely and much of the path is paved so it's easy to walk with the stroller.  And yes, those are bones she's playing with... strange, right?

We even took a little detour closer to the water, an area we haven't been to yet.

Then I had the bright idea to go on a real adventure and take the girls to the zoo.  We're about an hour away from DC and I love when we get the chance to take advantage of all the free stuff it has to offer.  We usually take the Metro in but I decided against such a long ride with 'Screaming Lilly' so we drove (you're very welcome fellow Metro riders!).  I guess January doesn't bring many people to the zoo which made it our nicest visit yet!  Even the animals were happy to see us!

 It was actually this little guys birthday!

 The day at the zoo took a lot out of Abby and my girl who hasn't ridden in a stroller in almost a year insisted on being driven back to the car.  We already went out and bought a Sit and Stand Stroller in case this happens again!

There was one morning that kind of got the best of me and I woke up kinda grumpy (being woken up 2-3 times a night will do that to a person!).  But then I looked outside and saw this:

What a pretty start to a day (that began way too early)!

Bye Bye Baby Weight!

One of the best parts about having a baby, aside from the obvious being Lilly, is losing the weight after.  I have always struggled with my weight and gained entirely too much with both pregnancies.  It wasn't as big of an issue after Abby because I was still smaller than I ever was at my heaviest.  This time it's different because I was still carrying the extra fluff from the first time so even though I gained less with Lilly, I am now heavier than I have ever been.

That was enough to make me really WANT to change things this time, hopefully for good.  So, 5 weeks have gone by and I'm down about 25 lbs by just eating healthier!  WOO HOO!!  I had a little setback with Thanksgiving (far too many cookies and too few people to share them with) but I finally made up for it!

The biggest hurdle I've always had to overcome was saying NO to all the goodies.  I'm a snacker and if I have it in the house then I'll eat it.  I mean, I will go to bed wanting it and then wake up craving it and will not be satisfied until it's gone which leaves me feeling guilty.  I will quite literally hide in the kitchen stuffing my face!  Yes, I am a fat kid at heart.

Holidays are the worse because they revolve around food, especially the cookies and cakes.  The thought of limiting what we bake is painful to even think about!  So, my goal is to lose at least 5 lbs by Christmas so that I don't set myself back to where I was for Thanksgiving.  It's going to take a lot of planning and will power but I'm in because my long term goal is to lose 40 more... 20 will put me back to where I was pre-Lilly and another 20 will put me back to where I was pre-Abby.

I plan on keeping you all updated throughout my journey and would love to hear any tips or tricks you may have!

No More Yo Yo... I Mean It!

When Dan was in Iraq, I got a job working for LA Weight Loss.  A job that I was sure I was too heavy for... I just kept thinking why would anyone want to take weight loss advice from me when I need to lose more than a few pounds?  Well, they hired me anyway and I was so excited to start because I couldn't wait to learn how to eat healthy and then help other people who were just like me... struggling to eat good food and still lose weight.  

The job was not a success for me for many reasons but the diet was.  I lost about 30 lbs and felt great!  I kept the weight off for a few years, fluctuating up and down here and there.  Then, I got a job in an office as opposed to retail.  Then, I got pregnant.  Then, I got depressed.  

Now, I'm right back where I started so many years ago.  Now, the obstacles are different since I'm a stay at home mom.  Now, I can't really afford to pay a weekly membership to have someone monitor my food diary or for the special food that makes the diet tolerable.

And now, my husband is following my lead.  He went to the doctor today and was told his blood pressure is too high.  No doubt because of our fantastic ability to always be out during lunch or dinner resulting in a lovely fast food meal.

Now, after all this time of mentioning losing weight, I'm dedicating myself to actually doing it.  I'm tired of feeling uncomfortable in my own skin and would love to have more energy.  We've been making little tweaks here and there but have a terrible habit of rewarding ourselves with food.  

Next week will be rough though.  Dan's parents are coming this Friday and visiting for a week which means lots of day trips and probably lots of eating out.  My first goal is to plan and make some healthy desserts.  My second goal is to eat a salad because I just learned that salads can actually taste good.  They can, I SWEAR!  

I never knew it, but I like spinach way more than I like lettuce.  To me, lettuce was just a filler for a salad and did nothing for me.  Spinach, on the other hand, is yummy!  Especially with strawberries, feta cheese, almond slices and balsamic vinegar... delish!

I know a lot of people are probably just like me and have a hard time finding meals that are simple, tasty and healthy.  During one of my many searches, I came across an awesome site.  Gina's Skinny Recipes contains recipes for just about everything, only they are healthier versions.  Her goal is to make weight watcher friendly meals, so it's great for anyone out there who counts points.

Most importantly, everything I have tried so far has been fabulous!  Tonight we had the Turkey and Black Bean Enchilada and I loved it so much that I'm substituting it for the lasagna I was going to make next week.  I'm an Italian girl, so that definitely says something!

I am desperately hoping that I'm strong enough to stick with my plans for next week because this extra fluff needs to go.  With that, I leave you with a joke I heard on Facebook today:

I figured out why I'm so fat! The shampoo I use in the shower that runs down my body says "for extra volume and body". I'm going to start using Dawn dish washing soap. It says "dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove."

"What Not to Wear"

Image by Getty Images via @daylife

Did you ever see that show, "What not to Wear?"  Or read the back page of Cosmo where they show pictures of fashion don'ts?  Well, there are days that I resemble the people they feature way too much.

Today, I actually went out to the grocery store in stretch pants.  Some may call them yoga pants but to me... STRETCH PANTS!  Pre-motherhood, I would have never been caught dead leaving the house like that.  I can see my picture now with that dreaded black bar over my eyes to protect my identity from my shameful decision.

Oh, I also had no makeup on and crazy hair.  Thankfully, it was clean hair.... just half curly, half straight, clean crazy hair.

Makes me wonder... where have I gone?  Yes, there are so many blessings that come with motherhood.  Yes, I am eternally grateful that my husband is able to pick up enough overtime so that I can stay home.

But, I think I'm in a rut.  With only one car, there are days that I don't leave the house.  Having nowhere to go, no time to be there, and no one to see is making it difficult for me to see the point in dealing with the hassle of getting a shower before 8pm.  With no shower comes no picking out outfits, doing of hair, or putting on makeup.  Leaving me feeling like I wasted a day.

The problem is that this is not a good routine for me.  I need to get ready for my day.  I need to feel like 'me'.  And I need to not be in a room full of mirrors with Stacy and Clinton telling me how many 'fashion no-no's' I'm currently wearing.

So, I've been bribing Abby to work with me on this.  I've been working out daily for the past couple of weeks.  At first, I only worked out when Abby was sleeping but I seemed to loose my motivation by the time she took a nap.  So, now I give her the portable DVD player, throw in a kid movie, and magic happens!  To think, there was a time when I swore that Abby wouldn't watch TV!

She's glued to the screen.  She carries her movie around with her if wants to sit somewhere else.  The most awesome part... she doesn't try to stand behind my butt when I do a squat!  

I even figured out how to get a shower afterwards by taking her in with me!  When I'm done, I let her stay in and play while I get ready in the bathroom.  I have to admit, I miss my privacy but this has so many advantages.  It gives me time to put face cream on.  Put lotion on my legs.  Put mouse in my hair.  It's wonderful!

If I do all of this before nap time then I even get time to catch up the things that I can't do when she's awake.  Fun things, like putting my clothes away in the bedroom or cleaning the bathroom or maybe even unloading the dishwasher!

I think I've finally figured out how to be 'me' and a mom.  That is, until she gets bored with the dvd player and goes through another phase where she doesn't like baths or showers (which happens out of nowhere and lasts for weeks).  Or perhaps she'll decide that she doesn't like taking afternoon naps anymore and our whole day will be turned around.  You ever notice that once you have things figured out, they change?

So, I'm curious, how do other mommas do it?  Anyone have a clever tip they can share?

Hi My Name is Kasey... and I'm an Addict

It's been 6 hours since my last Mountain Dew.  I have been addicted for years.  I stopped drinking it while I was pregnant only to pick up the habit again.  I drink about 16 ounces a day which didn't sound like a lot to me.  Until recently.  In my never-ending journey to lose weight I signed up for Spark People.  It's a really helpful website that helps you track how many calories, carbs, and fats you consume each day.  There are so many features and resources that I'm still trying to figure out but the daily tracker is awesome!  Unfortunately, it showed me just how many of those daily calories and carbs I'm drinking.  220 Calories and 62 Carbs to be exact.... UGH!

I've been tracking for about 4 days and I know it's time to say good bye to my habit but habits are hard to break.  Right now I'm hungry.  My bag of Sun Chips at Subway along with the Dew I drank has put me a little over my calories for the day.  I'm not way over but I know that if I didn't drink that Dew today then I would be able to have a healthy snack tonight.  It's sad that I am willing to substitute a bottle of soda for food.  Can you say addicted?!?  

As I'm sitting here thinking about what I'm going to eat tomorrow, I find myself still factoring my Dew in.  To eat or to drink... this is a toughie!  As long as I make extremely healthy food choices, it should fit in just fine... Right?  I know, I know. I'll give it up cold turkey as soon as the last 4 bottles are gone!  Pinky promise!

1 lb At a Time: Week 3

It's time again for a weight loss update!  I'm down a total of 2 lbs... could be better but could be worse.  I have the hardest time with will power.  This week held many challenges:  my sister was here and wanted ice cream (doesn't sound too bad but we bought 3 half gallons because they were on sale 3 for $6) and I went on a date with the Hubbins.  So, I tried to behave but not deprive myself.  I only ate half of my food at Olive Garden which left me full but not 'can't button my pants stuffed'.  Honestly, it made the rest of the day more enjoyable because I wasn't so uncomfortable.  Second, I had much less ice cream then I normally would and after my sister left I tossed the rest!  Yup, 3 half gallons in the garbage!  If they were in my freezer, I'd be too tempted!

So, I was happy to see the additional lb come off.  Even though it's only 2 lbs, I feel different.  I worked out or walked 4 days this week and I think it's helping a lot.  Yesterday I was wearing the first pair of jeans I bought after having Abby and I could have wiggled right out them.  Don't get me wrong, they weren't falling to the floor but as I playing with Abby at Gymboree I had to keep pulling them up.  YAY!  So, the number isn't changing too much but I am which is ok by me!

This weeks challenge was to drink 8 glasses of water a day.  I used to drink nothing but water but lately soda has been sneaking in there and I'm just not drinking as much as I should.  So, the first few days I was able to get in about 32 oz a day.  On Wednesday, a light bulb went off and I decided to fill a 2 quart pitcher with water for the day so that I could monitor myself.  It worked!  Wednesday and Thursday I was able to drink the whole 64 oz and I'm on track to do so today!  We are supposed to give ourselves 1 point for each 8 oz so by the end of today I will have 40 points!

My goals for next week are pretty much the same as they have been.  I want to step up the distance I walk from 2 miles to 4 miles and keep up with my mini workouts I do at home (I usually do a 10 or 20 minute workout courtesy of exercise tv).  If there are any fellow walkers or runners out there, I can across this great site, www.dailymile.com, which lets you create routes and gives you an accurate distance.  Awesome site!  I also hope to make the best choices possible.  Abby and I are going away for a long weekend to visit family and car rides are tough.  We'll probably be in the car for about 18 hours over the course of 4 days.  My plan is to bring lots of healthy snacks and lots of music and toys to keep Abby entertained!

1 lb At a Time: Week 2

I have a million excuses for why I wasn't as successful as I hoped I would be this week.  I was doing good until I went back to PA to help clean my mom's room.  My mom passed away in July and up until Thursday her bag that she packed to come visit me was still packed.  As you can imagine, it was a very hard 2 days and the food choices were quite terrible.  It's no excuse but I'm an emotional eater and I was emotional.

Then Sunday was Mother's Day.  I told my husband not to do anything special but he surprised me with a trip to Smokey Bones.  It was a nice surprise but I was very disappointed that they no longer serve onion rings so I got dessert in it's place!  Again, my emotions were all over the place so I didn't make very good choices.

But these are just excuses and we all know the saying about excuses, right?  So, instead of beating myself up (since I actually did lose 1 lb, amazing!) I'm going to focus on what changes I can put in place so that I am successful.

I think my biggest problem is that I stay up so late and then I get up once or twice with Abby so I am tired in the morning.  I tend to lay around and play with her until her morning nap and then use that time to shower.  So, instead I think I'm going to get up and actually get moving!  My plan is to start my day by working out, even if it means that I have to watch up for the little person that will certainly be attacking my legs the whole time!  Even if it's just 20 minutes each morning.  I think this on top of walking should really kick start my weight loss.

Wish me luck!  I'll let you know how moving in the morning works out!

Week 1: Losing it 1 lb at a Time

Here we are in week 1 of "Losing it 1 lb at a Time" and since I'm not brave enough to enter my actual weight (actually I hate to admit that number even to myself) we will say my weight is 15 lbs which is how much I would like to lose at the end of the 8 weeks.

Our question this week is "What is one thing that you find makes you fee beautiful/good about yourself and why?"  For me, it's getting my eyebrows done.  I try to go every 2 weeks but lately it's been more like once a month.  I just feel so much better/awake/alive when I have nice clean brows.  It's one of the few things that I take the time to do for myself and I am miserable when I can't get them done.

I was reviewing my original goals, which you can find by clicking here, and I can honestly say so far I have not been a very good girl!  I hit a few snags trying to eat healthy this week.

• I took out chicken breast Saturday for dinner.  Unfortunately, I took it out of the freezer in the afternoon and it was not defrosted in time (it was probably a subconscious thing... just thinking about dieting makes me crave deliciously bad food!).  So, instead my Hubbins suggested pizza.  Who can turn down pizza?  Of course, he ordered breadsticks too (another weakness, ugh!)
• We took the baby on a walk in downtown Annapolis and got ice cream on Monday.  
• I bought a chicken the other day and started noticing a smell in my kitchen.  Thought it was the garbage disposal but nope, it was the chicken aka last nights dinner.  Since the Hubbins had to be in work for 6 last night we took the easy route and hit up Burger King.

As you can see, I have not stayed true to my goals.  However, I have been working out or walking (yes! one goal accomplished!) every day.  Hopefully, that's enough to compensate for my gluttony!  The bad news is, I'm driving to PA tomorrow.  It's a 3.5 hour ride and we'll be busy so cooking healthy is not going to happen.  Hopefully, all the heavy cleaning will burn lots of calories!  I'm determined to behave next week and hopefully I'll be down at least a pound or two by then!

I Can Not Believe I am Posting This!

I'm nervous to write this.  Once I write this I will be committed.  I've toyed with whether or not to do this and in the end the fear of failure seems like just the right amount of motivation I need to win my battle.  It's a battle I spent my whole life trying to conquer.  I've been successful from time to time but I have yet to be able to claim a full victory.  I bet you guessed the battle I'm referring.... the Battle of the Bulge!

I follow this awesome blog Our Mommyhood and they featured Lisa at This Mommy Works.  Lisa has decided to issue a weight loss challenge, 1 lb at a time, and I've decided to join in.  I am so afraid of not losing an ounce since I have no willpower.  I am hoping that being held accountable for eating like a cow will help me change my ways.  The list is open until April 30th and the challenge starts on May 1st. So if you want to join in the fun then click the button below to read the rules and check out the other brave souls!

So, the first step in this challenge is to name the reasons why I joined and what my goals are.  Let's start with why... because I need to lose weight!  Ok, let me be specific... I need to lose 30 lbs.  I am still 20 lbs heavier then I was when I got pregnant and prior to that I had 10 lbs that I could not get rid of.  What can I say... my extra fluff loves me!  

My goals:

• To condition myself to eat healthy 90% of the time.  Hey, a girl needs a treat once in awhile!
• To learn and share with my fellow competitors tips, tricks, and motivation
• To lose 15 lbs by the end of the 8 weeks.
• To use this challenge as a motivator to actually start training for the 3Day in October.  

FYI:  I was eating Doritos as I typed this post.  Man, do I have a lot of work to do!

Easter... too much food, too little time!

I hope everyone had a happy Easter.  I know we did! But boy... did we eat! I have never met another family that eats as much as ours.  Here's our menu:

• At 1:30 we ate salad, salami, cheese, olives, bread... my Dad calls this antipasta but it is a meal in itself!
• At 2:30 we at lasagna and more bread.
• At 5:30 we ate ham, sweet potato casserole, potatoes, broccoli, some sort of clam dip, and applesauce (I know I am forgetting something!).
• At 7:00 we ate dessert:  4 different types of cookies, 2 types of cakes, coconut custard pie, biscotti, and brownies.

Can anyone say fat fest?  As a family we definitely go all out when it comes to food yet there always seems to be something missing... this year I was sad to see there wasn't any cannoli.  I remember the first time my husband ate a Sunday dinner at my Nan's house.  He was amazed! 

I love our dysfunctional tendencies when it comes to food... but I hate it too.  My thighs and butt are evidence of many years of overdoing it.  I constantly want or am trying to lose weight but all it takes is one day and I'm back on the wagon!  It's an addiction... I actually get grumpy if a craving goes unfulfilled.  I am determined to take control of this... to lose weight, eat healthy, work out, and stay that way.... but I think I'll wait until after Abby's birthday party.  How could I possibly not have a piece of her first birthday cake?  True fat kid mentality!