Thursday, January 26, 2012

Parenting is Ever Changing

I have come to the conclusion that kids, infants in particular, understand way more than we give them credit for.  I remember when Abby was real little it seemed like every time I bragged about this great schedule she was on, she would do something different the following day.  I learned to stop discussing her sleeping or eating habits.... EVER!

Lilly just did a similar trick last night.  Dan and I were just saying how great it was that she sleeps through the night only getting up once or maybe twice for a quick 2 oz bottle and falling right back to sleep.  Last night,  she woke up three times and wanted 4 oz one of those times.  Yup, never talking about her schedule again either!

Now Abby has really out did herself because she actually changed up a habit I recently wrote about.  Can she really read?  Do kids have some sort of ESP?  It's like they know when we get used to something and say to themselves, "Oh, I'll show them.  How about this for a change of pace?"

Remember last week when I wrote about tv viewing?  Remember how I said that having the tv on does not stop her from playing and only catches her interest for a few minutes at a time?  Well, in an effort to remain honest with all of you, I have to admit that is not the case anymore.

It started the other day.  She wanted to watch Toy Story, her favorite movie, and I agreed.  It was over right in time for bed time.  Now, she didn't just sit glued to the tv and half the time she wasn't even in the same room as the tv.  When it was over, I shut the tv off and told her to get her bed ready and pick out a story.

Well, the tears that followed were INCREDIBLE!  She was crying so hard that she was practically hyperventilating.  I read somewhere that you should always try to be sympathetic to your kid's tears, so I tried.  I told her that I understood she felt sad because she loves that movie but that we could always watch it another day.  I hugged her and told her I loved her but still tried to get her ready for bed.

After 15 minutes, my patience was thin.  All I could think was this sympathizing stuff is total garbage.  I get that she's sad but it's tv for crying out loud!  All I wanted was for her to go to bed!  It didn't help that Lilly was doing her normal 'I'm not in mommy's arms so I'm going to scream/cry for as long as it takes for mommy to come and get me.'

So, after 15 minutes, I told her that if she did not stop crying and pick out her story then there would be no story tonight.  Finally, she stopped, had a story read to her, and I was exhausted.

It didn't stop there.  The past couple of days have been filled with tv requests and theatrics when the request is denied.  I feel like I totally missed the mark here because obviously what I thought was just background noise was more to her.

So, our new rule (started yesterday), is to have very limited tv in our house.  We are getting back to listening to music for background noise and movie nights will be a special exception to the rule.  I'm not going to lie, the tv will go on everyday but only for carefully selected shows and then off it goes when it's over.  I refuse to have a 2 year old get that emotional over something so silly.

And yes, I did tell her that I thought that what she crying over was actually silly but that was only after my patience for the situation was nonexistent.

So, as much as I see the learning value in some shows and as easy as it is to keep it on, I have to change my mind on how much tv is a good thing.  Parenting is about being flexible and making changes when necessary and this change has to be made.

Proves once again that once I think I know what works, I realize that I have no idea!

1 comment:

  1. My daughter gets upset when I turn off the TV, but I don't attribute it to her being obsessed with it. Granted, I don't know how old your daughter is, but mine just turned 3 and I believe the reason she cries so much is because she doesn't know how else to show her emotions other than just to just freak out. She doesn't have the cognitive ability to know the difference between being upset and expressing it in a calm manner and freaking out. She just has a happy mode and a unhappy/freak out mode. Hopefully that makes sense.

    I agree that TV needs to be regulated and I think using music as background noise is such a great idea. I try to do that as well.

    And I can TOTALLY relate to not talking about how great sleeping habits are. I always jinxed myself when my daughter was little.



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