Monday, October 4, 2010

Disappointment: Forgiving and Moving Forward

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.
 - Buddha

Have you ever been so disappointed in someone that it makes you wonder if you ever really knew them?  Yesterday I found out that someone close to me did something unthinkable.  It is so awful that I don't even want to think about it or say it out loud.  Unfortunately, I don't know exactly who it was so now I will forever be suspicious.  The only way to move past it is to forgive but it's hard because I gave the person an opportunity to redeem themselves anonymously and they did not.  All I know is that someone I love and would do anything for, is dishonest and selfish.  I can not tell you how much my heart breaks just thinking about this.

I believe that everything that happens in our life gives us the opportunity to become a better, stronger person.  We always have a choice between right and wrong.  We also always have the choice to right a wrong choice.  I feel disappointed that someone closest to me has not taken advantage of difficult times and learned some valuable lessons.  I feel disappointed that they are not the person that I know they are capable of being.  My only hope is that on their journey through life, they become the person I always knew they would be.


"I'm not angry because you lied to me, I'm angry because I can't trust you anymore" 
- Unknown

11 comments:

  1. I've had a friend recently break my heart as well. Unimagineable. I'm still shocked. It is amazing that despite our age and wisdom we don't seem to ever grow up in many respects!

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  2. It's hard to deal with something like that, especially since you gave the person a chance to redeem themselves. But then, not all of us are always able to live up to our highest self at all times.
    Anyways, dropping in to say hi!
    Shinjini - Flipper tribe

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  3. I am so sorry you have to deal with this hurt. I know about the pain of someone you love being dishonest. I learned it very early on with my first true love who I was with for ten years. It had make me lose the ability to fully trust again. It takes a lot to forgive at times, but the really difficult thing is to trust again. I hope you can get through this stronger. Have a good night.

    Mama Hen

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  4. I really needed to read this today. My Dad has repeatedly disappointed me and every time I give him another chance he blows it.

    I'm so heartbroken that I can't even let myself feel anything anymore.

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  5. I have struggled all my life in this department... forgiving.

    Sorry you had to go through it.

    Reenie
    Fellow Flipper

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  6. I can relate as well. I've had both friends and family members do things that I really have a hard time forgiving. I know it hurts ME, not them, to hang onto the pain. But it's still hard to let it go.

    Stopping by from the SITS Flippers!

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  7. Stopping in from Team Flipper.

    I'm sorry you are experiencing such hurt! I have a friend who said she is forgiving someone who hurt her in layers--it comes about slowly.

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  8. Oh Kasey, I'm so sorry your going through this! People disappoint me more than I'd like to admit but sometimes I hold my expectations too high. I'm not at all suggesting you've done that here but just sharing my experience. Hope Abby is doing great!!

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  9. I'm sorry to hear this as well, it must be such a shock to discover this.

    I love when you write that:
    "I believe that everything that happens in our life gives us the opportunity to become a better, stronger person"
    That is so true, I could do with remembering that more. I'm going to write it in my journal right now.

    Jade

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  10. Kasey I hope you are feeling better and that you are able to work through this disapointment. It is a hard thing to deal with in life. I hope you are well.

    Mama Hen

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  11. It is always disappointing when someone you thought was one way lets you down and breaks your trust and confidence in them. Unfortunately, I know all too well how that feels. I hope you find some peace in all of this.

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