Monday, October 4, 2010

Disappointment: Forgiving and Moving Forward

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.
 - Buddha

Have you ever been so disappointed in someone that it makes you wonder if you ever really knew them?  Yesterday I found out that someone close to me did something unthinkable.  It is so awful that I don't even want to think about it or say it out loud.  Unfortunately, I don't know exactly who it was so now I will forever be suspicious.  The only way to move past it is to forgive but it's hard because I gave the person an opportunity to redeem themselves anonymously and they did not.  All I know is that someone I love and would do anything for, is dishonest and selfish.  I can not tell you how much my heart breaks just thinking about this.

I believe that everything that happens in our life gives us the opportunity to become a better, stronger person.  We always have a choice between right and wrong.  We also always have the choice to right a wrong choice.  I feel disappointed that someone closest to me has not taken advantage of difficult times and learned some valuable lessons.  I feel disappointed that they are not the person that I know they are capable of being.  My only hope is that on their journey through life, they become the person I always knew they would be.

"I'm not angry because you lied to me, I'm angry because I can't trust you anymore" 
- Unknown


  1. I've had a friend recently break my heart as well. Unimagineable. I'm still shocked. It is amazing that despite our age and wisdom we don't seem to ever grow up in many respects!

  2. It's hard to deal with something like that, especially since you gave the person a chance to redeem themselves. But then, not all of us are always able to live up to our highest self at all times.
    Anyways, dropping in to say hi!
    Shinjini - Flipper tribe

  3. I am so sorry you have to deal with this hurt. I know about the pain of someone you love being dishonest. I learned it very early on with my first true love who I was with for ten years. It had make me lose the ability to fully trust again. It takes a lot to forgive at times, but the really difficult thing is to trust again. I hope you can get through this stronger. Have a good night.

    Mama Hen

  4. I really needed to read this today. My Dad has repeatedly disappointed me and every time I give him another chance he blows it.

    I'm so heartbroken that I can't even let myself feel anything anymore.

  5. I have struggled all my life in this department... forgiving.

    Sorry you had to go through it.

    Fellow Flipper

  6. I can relate as well. I've had both friends and family members do things that I really have a hard time forgiving. I know it hurts ME, not them, to hang onto the pain. But it's still hard to let it go.

    Stopping by from the SITS Flippers!

  7. Stopping in from Team Flipper.

    I'm sorry you are experiencing such hurt! I have a friend who said she is forgiving someone who hurt her in layers--it comes about slowly.

  8. Oh Kasey, I'm so sorry your going through this! People disappoint me more than I'd like to admit but sometimes I hold my expectations too high. I'm not at all suggesting you've done that here but just sharing my experience. Hope Abby is doing great!!

  9. I'm sorry to hear this as well, it must be such a shock to discover this.

    I love when you write that:
    "I believe that everything that happens in our life gives us the opportunity to become a better, stronger person"
    That is so true, I could do with remembering that more. I'm going to write it in my journal right now.


  10. Kasey I hope you are feeling better and that you are able to work through this disapointment. It is a hard thing to deal with in life. I hope you are well.

    Mama Hen

  11. It is always disappointing when someone you thought was one way lets you down and breaks your trust and confidence in them. Unfortunately, I know all too well how that feels. I hope you find some peace in all of this.



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