Tuesday, December 7, 2010

"The days of our lives, for all of us, are numbered." Elizabeth Edwards

I'm sorry, this post might come off as a little depressing for the holiday season.  I just found out that Elizabeth Edwards passed away this morning.  I have to say it hit pretty close to home.  Both her and my mom fought breast cancer for 6 long years.

Elizabeth Edwards left behind 3 kids, her oldest is about the same age as me so I feel like I have pretty good idea what she's feeling right now.  She was pretty open about her diagnosis so I'm sure in some ways she tried to prepare them for this but truthfully there is no such thing.  Losing your mom at such a young age is hard.

My sister asked me recently if anything will ever feel like a happy occasion again.  For us, there's always something... someone... missing.  I'm sure with time it will ache less but I'm sure we'll always feel that way.  A few days before my mom passed away, she cried over how much she was going to miss out on.  I tried to reassure her that she'll have the best seat in the house, but I know at the time that it was only words.  Until she said it, I never thought of it.  I'm choked up right now thinking of the big things that she'll miss... engagements, weddings, grandkids.  All I pray is that on each of my sister's wedding days, I say the right thing because Lord knows... it's going to be a little tougher for the girls.

Which is why my heart goes out to her children, especially the younger 2.

I thought I would share a poem my dad found and sent to me.  Reading it reminded me that no matter what happens, there are two ways to look at things.

You can shed tears that she is gone, 
or you can smile because she has lived. 
You can close your eyes and pray that she'll come back, 
or you can open your eyes and see all she's left. 
Your heart can be empty because you can't see her, 
or you can be full of the love you shared. 
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, 
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday. 
You can remember her only that she is gone, 
or you can cherish her memory and let it live on. 
You can cry and close your mind, 
be empty and turn your back. 
Or you can do what she'd want: 
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

~David Harkins~


  1. My mom really looked up to Elizabeth Edwards, and it's so sad to me that they both died from the same disease. Thank you for sharing that poem; those are good things to remember.

  2. I'm sad about this. She was a strong lady and I admired her.

    I'm sorry for your loss. :(

  3. That poem is beautiful! It is sad to see her pass as your Mom did. Stupid Cancer. Touching post and your right your Mom indeed has the best seat in the house.

  4. Try to always remember that your mom isn't gone, she just isn't here. She lives inside of all of you and will continue to do so as long as you remember her. Remembering just the loss can be, and will always be difficult. But try to remember the good times. The times you laughed and the silliness, the love you shared and the happy times you will always have in your heart. Remember the things you miss the most. The love, the talks, the fun times. Keep those things alive in you. What you miss the most, learn to do for others. This will give you that warm feeling in your heart that you and all of you, miss.
    But most important be, what she always thought you all were, be the best person you can be.
    Time will make it easier. But we never forget the people who have touched us so deeply. We will always miss them. That's the way it should be.



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