Happy Halloween!

I hope this post finds everyone on the east coast safe and sound after Sandy!

We made it through unscathed... we didn't even lose power which I am so grateful for!  For those of you who weren't as lucky, my heart breaks for you.  I've seen pictures, and it's just devastating.

I know some areas are postponing Halloween but we are going ahead and Trick or Treating today.  Abby couldn't be more excited, she even popped out of bed in character!

Wishing everyone a happy, safe, and frightening Halloween whether you're celebrating today or another day!

Oh, and Ginnie Mare, yes those Sprickets are a real thing.  Some people call them cave spiders I think.  And we did have one encounter the other night and lost it before we could get it so I know it's lurking in a corner waiting to jump at me!

Worry... Rational, Irrational and Gangnam Style

I'm a bit of a nervous wreck right now.  I'm afraid a tree is going to fall on the house.  Or that my girls are going to freak out when we lose power.  Or that my house is going to be over run by these devilish creatures:

Photo Courtesy of Spricket Haters Facebook page

For those of you that don't know about these ugly things, they're called sprickets.  They're a cross between a cricket and spider, aka mutant.  Oh, and they jump (high) at you when you try to kill them because they're attracted to shadows.  Your best bet is to try to throw something, like an exercise ball, at them.  It's the best use I've found for an exercise ball thus far.

Ok, so maybe that may seem a bit irrational so let me also add that I'm also worried like crazy for the hubs who just left for work.  Sometimes it's just not fun to be married to someone who has a job that makes them essential during state emergencies.  So, my girls, sister and I will be holding down the fort here at home... FUN!

Since lots of you are probably busy worrying and bunkering down for the Frankenstorm, I thought I'd share my new favorite song.  I have no idea why, but this song just makes me want to shake my groove thang!

Mommy/Daughter Day

At this time last year, Abby would have considered herself an only child.  Yes, she knew that my enormous belly held her sister but she had no idea what that REALLY meant.

She was too little to understand that once Lilly was here, there would be little time for anyone to focus just on her.

She had no idea that her toys would now become 'their toys.'

She could in no way comprehend what it would feel like to have another family member thrown into the mix.

I must say, she's handled it better than I ever thought she would.  She accepted her as part of us since the moment she saw her.  Crying when she left the hospital because she wanted not only me, but also her sister to come home with her.

However, sometimes I see her need to have undivided attention creep in.  She wants me to freely chase her at the park or cuddle up in her bed at the drop of a hat to read a story.  Sometimes, it just not possible.  Sometimes I have to stay closer to Lilly whose just too little to run around the park.  Sometimes I just have laundry/cleaning/cooking to do and not enough time to do it in.

So, when a friend asked me to go to Disney on Ice, I wanted to say yes but couldn't.  I needed someone to watch Lilly and both Dan and my sister were working.  So, I had no choice but to say no.

Except, I had assumed my sister was working and she actually wasn't.  So the night before the show, while Abby was sleeping, I decided that we could go.  Unfortunately, the seats next to my friend were already taken.  We'd be sitting a few rows behind her.

Initially, I thought this was a recipe for disaster.  I was sure that once Abby realized that she wasn't sitting by her BFF, we would be in tantrum city.

I underestimated the magic of Disney.  We got to our seats mere seconds before the show started.  In no time, Abby was in my lap looking at the characters (especially the beloved Minnie) with awe.  To say she loved the show would be an understatement.  She was completely entranced by all of the characters, music, lights, and dancing.

I enjoyed the show too of course, but the highlight was having my first born cuddle up on me the entire show.  Little Miss Independent hasn't done that in a long time and it felt good to spend the afternoon with her.

I am so grateful that my friend gave us the tickets and that we did, for part of the show anyways, sit a few rows back.  It gave Abby and I time to be just the two of us.  It reminded just how little my big girl is.

And, these past few days have been WAY less tantrum filled.  I'm guessing a day together is just what the 2 of us needed!

(For the record, I kept feeling like I was forgetting something (or someone) throughout the day.)

Super Mom

Source: Uploaded by user via Aeschine on Pinterest

Lately, I've been letting stress get the best of me.

These past few days, I have been up to my eyeballs in poopy diapers and runny noses.  On top of a nagging, but thankfully not serious, medical issue that I have been getting for the past few months.

I've been grumpy.  Caught up in the monotony of daily chores.  Easily rattled and quick to lose my temper.

As accepting as I am in each of my girls habits and needs, I've been finding myself frustrated by Abby's free spirit and Lilly's tendency to want to be plastered to my hip.

 I'm not happy with myself.  I feel guilty for the tone I use and my reactions.

I was talking to a friend the other day who was letting off steam about how she feels like she just can't do it all.  Dinner, reading, playing, cleaning... the list goes on and on.

I gave her advice:  there's nothing wrong with pizza for dinner, let the cleaning wait, don't miss the little moments.  I told her there's no such thing as a SUPERMOM.

Yet, today, I sat here and texted Dan to tell him that I'm a failure.  Telling him that now I'm having second thoughts about not sending Abby to preschool.  Telling him that I'm frustrated and feel stuck.  Feeling like my days have no purpose or destination.

I was having a pity party because I have been walking around with tissues and Lysol wipes for days.  Because neither of my girls napped.  Because a project I had planned for the afternoon went wrong.

Then I realized, that I need to take my own advice.  Things will never be perfect.  Yes, I had a vision that the project would be a hit with Abby and keep her occupied for a while.  I envisioned Lilly exploring the glue and tissue paper, all while staying put on the tablecloth so I could leave her without a diaper to try to clear up her diaper rash (the first one either of my kids have ever had).

I envisioned rainbows and unicorns.

My reality was chaos and mess.

Instead of rolling with it, I got frustrated.  I beat myself up and called myself a failure.

How could I expect it to work out any different?  Two sick and tired kids... a recipe for disaster.  Yet, I set a standard for myself that anyone else would have called ridiculous.

Don't we all have moments like this?  Moments that don't turn out right.  Moments where we don't behave the way we know we should.

I also realized this, after I had a mini breakdown that required 5 minutes of quiet time, kids don't care about a clean house or elaborate projects.  That want to play, with you.  They want to do something, with you.  They want to know where their favorite toys are.  They don't want our definition of a Supermom, they have their very own definition for that.  One that is far more forgiving than ours.

I need to remind myself, that what I think I should be and what my kids need me to be are two separate things.  I am willing to bet that any Mom who worries about whether or not they are doing right by their kids, probably is doing a perfect job.

So, I now believe that there is such thing as a Supermom.  A Mom that is perfect.  I am that Mom for my kids, and I'm sure you are a Supermom to yours.

The next time I'm beating myself up, I'm going to drop everything and just be.  I have 2 happy, healthy, thriving girls.  Full of giggles and songs and the sweetest dance moves I have ever seen.  Only a SUPERMOM could raise 2 kids like that.

What's New: A Bunch of Randomness

It's been a Murphy's Law kind of a week.  Seriously, 7 straight days of things just going wrong in one way or another.  I'm over it and looking forward to a fun weekend visiting family!

Since I'm sure you can all imagine that kind of a week, I won't bore you with the details.  I thought I'd fill you in on some of the randomness going on in the world of my kiddos.

• I shared this video the other day, but one of the biggest changes this past week is that Lilly is finally walking!  Everywhere!!!!!  She doesn't like being confined to the stroller anymore and very rarely crawls around the house.  It still makes me smile when I see how proud she is of herself.  She is one cute little walker!

• Abby has been moved into her big girl bed!  She was a little upset that her new bedding doesn't have both Minnie and Princesses on it, however.  If only I could sew maybe we could make that happen.  Unfortunately, I don't see myself taking up a new skill anytime soon so she'll have to live with flowers for a while.

• Speaking of princesses, suddenly Abby is on a princess kick.  Her favorite is Sleeping Beauty because she likes her pink dress.  It's so bad that tomorrow she wants to wear this dress on our vacation (a weekend trip to Pennsylvania):  

She also wanted me to wear my wedding dress today, which hasn't fit since the day I got married.  My choice of flip flops when I went out to clean my car was also met with disapproval.  Apparently, heels are more fashionable! 

• Proving that kids are a walking set of contradictions, my little princess was eating her boogers the other night.  When I tried to explain why boogers are not a good food choice, she started crying.  Not just any cry, but full blown sobbing.  Finally she said, "I am just so hungry and I don't know what to eat!"  I don't make it a habit to laugh at my crying kids, but that was just too funny!!

• One of Lilly's favorite things right now is electrical cords.  She pulled the plug out of the computer the other day and broke it, leaving us without a computer for a few days.  I was little bit lost and VERY thankful for my IPod!