From Screaming to Smiling Lilly

I can not believe that Lilly is 4 months old already!  In some ways it has flown by and in others it has seemed never ending.

The doctor said she's colicky.  My Grandmother said she's spoiled.  I've heard it all from she needs more food to her diapers too tight.  The bottom line is that she can scream.  Not cry, SCREAM.  The longer she goes on, the more worked up she gets.

I have tried pacifiers, they make her even more angry.  So I usually try food, sometimes it works like a charm and sometimes she takes a few sips and screams some more.

I have tried white noise.  I have tried rocking, swinging, bouncing, swaddling, singing, making a 'shhhhhh' noise.

I have tried almost every formula, including that crazy expensive Nutramigen, for the recommended 2 weeks with no success.

There is no fool proof way to calm her down, I just reach into my bag of tricks and try everything until something works.  She needs to get her angst out and eventually she will sleep.

And those moments of quiet are AMAZING!

There was a time throughout these last few months that I thought there was no hope.  I was tired and frustrated and feared that I just couldn't do it.

I feared that Abby would get resentful and wouldn't get the attention she needed.

But here we are, 4 months in, and I am happy report that things are slowly changing.  The screaming is less frequent and I am able to rest my arms throughout the day.

Abby is not resentful or jealous at all.  When Lilly fusses, she does everything she can to make her happy.  She loves to sing to her and tell her stories and Lilly lights up when she walks into the room.

The endless rocking, comforting, bouncing, and cuddling is leading to a very happy, smiley little girl.

It has been a long couple of months, Lilly Bean, but we are getting there.  We are figuring things out together and I am not so afraid anymore.  Sometimes I just don't know what's wrong but it doesn't mean I stop trying to make you feel better.

My advice to moms who may have a baby who they just can't seem to figure out:  Stay calm, keep trying, and show them love.  You will be amazed by the things you can do one handed.  You will learn how to create more time within a 24 hour day.  You will learn what things need to be done and what doesn't matter.  You will feel like you are about to lose your mind.  It will get better, things will change, and the payoff is worth it.

There is nothing more rewarding than walking into a room and seeing this smile.  Yup, losing my mind is definitely worth it!